16 and Pregnant

A girl's sitting in the bathroom. She's sixteen. She has hair cut into the latest style framing her face. Earlier that week she was talking with her friends about the latest celeb crush. Now she blinks her eyes several times because she can't believe what she just saw. But clear as day, there it is, those little pink lines, or the smiley face, or whatever it is that gives you an 18-life sentence of parenthood. She's scared to death. There is a small human growing inside of her body that she helped a young man create. What will her parents think? What will her boyfriend/fling/one night stand think? What will her friends think? What will her teachers in school think? What will her boss think? Will they treat her the same? Will she be able to keep a job? Will she be able to provide for the needs of a young, helpless, needy child? Will she be able to fulfill her own needs? How can she do that and finish school? Can her body handle the upcoming months? Can her mind?

A girl's sitting in the bathroom, staring at a small pregnancy test. She is pregnant.

As our country has evolved, teen pregnancy has become taboo. Think of several popular shows over the last 5-10 years: Juno, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, 16 and Pregnant, The Pregnancy Pact, Teen Mom (1 & 2) to name a few. There have been mixed reactions about these shows, however, much of what I've heard about these shows from others has been negative or downright hateful.

Now that I'm married, and out of my teen years, I've thought a lot about what it means to be pregnant. Frankly, the thought of it somehow inspires, scares, disgusts (can we just not think about the whole delivery part?), and awes me all at the same time. Even so, any child entrusted to Ty and me by God would be an absolute gift that I would cherish.

So what inspired all of this commentary? A post I saw online that went something like this:

Jane Doe: "Happy 20th birthday to me! Guess who wasn't a teenager and pregnant."

More than one of my Facebook friends made this post, especially around the time when Teen Mom was getting popular.

So I have to ask these people who condemn teen mothers:
What did you do that was so spectacular? Did you take your birth control pill at the same time every day at the risk of your health? Did you make sure to buy condoms at Walmart? Did you use mirena, or nuvaring, or whatever intrauterine device that is sure to be the topic of some type of lawsuit in a few years? Well, unless you abstained from sex until you were 20 years old, you haven't accomplished anything over a teen mother.

Teen parents have just gotten caught doing something that many other teens were doing.

Let that sink in.

In fact, teen parents have accomplished much more. They've felt and given one of God's most precious gifts: life. They've had to make decisions more difficult than many of us have dreamed of. They've been forced to consider someone's destiny other than their own. Their decisions have made them sacrifice. And, ultimately, their decisions led them to experience a parent's love from a entirely new perspective.

Is this situation ideal? I don't think so. Can it be avoided? Definitely. Do they deserve to be looked down upon/pitied/judged/one-upped/subjected to negative comments from others who also partook in teenaged sex? Absolutely not.

So next time you know of someone young who's starting a family, try to support them and encourage life, instead of demeaning it.