Thursday, October 2, 2014

I choose MY choice

In today's society, there are a few pretty basic decisions every person will hit in their life if they live until old age.

1) Should I graduate from high school?
2) Should I go to college?
3) If I go to college what will I major in?
4) If I major in that, where will I work?
5) If I decide to work in that field where will I live?
6) If I live there how will that affect my family?
7) Will I get married?
8) If I get married will I have children?
9) If I have children how will I raise them?
10) Where will I live to have my children go to school?
11) When will I retire?
12) If I retire how will I pay for it?
13) Where will I retire.

This is by no means a comprehensive list, but I think it covers some of the big ones. The main thing I'm trying to show is how much of that list happens before you're 25. In my life, I've already had to make decisions on about half of that list. I'm sure I'm not alone in this. The pressure  is insane. It's difficult enough to wonder if you're pleasing yourself, another thing all together if you're taking into consideration the opinion of family or friends--as most of us do.

One person I really admire in this regard is my brother, Dakota. Dakota is so intelligent that he can excel at anything he tries, he's also such a gifted artist that he could easily become a professional. All of us (his family) expected him to go to college, but he said he wasn't interested. We tried to persuade him. He still said no. He wanted to take time to just relax after the rigor of high school. So, he got a job. He is providing for himself. He is a hard worker, and his boss loves having him as an employee. I'm proud of him for that. He stood by what he thought was best for him while everyone else was telling him to do the opposite. Now, it is my time to take a leaf out of Dakota's book.

I started college majoring in animal sciences with the hopes of becoming a large animal veterinarian. I love working with cattle and I assumed this major would utilize my intelligence to its maximum potential while still allowing me to do something I love. I excelled in my first year and a half of college. With a 4.0, campus involvement, and undergraduate research, I was practically guaranteed admission to vet school. But I started feeling a nudge pulling me away from vet school. So, I thought, okay, I really liked AI (artificial insemination). I'll go to school for animal reproduction. Still science. Still cattle. The last semester before I studied abroad, I took animal A&P. I appreciated that class and it's challenges more than any class I have taken as an undergraduate. What really caught my attention was studying the nervous system, particularly when we spoke about how it affects mood and can relate to psychiatric disorders. This was quite a leap from reproduction, but still doable. Many vet schools offer masters degrees in neuroscience. That's a good path for me, I thought. My life was turned upside down when I studied abroad.

The six months I spent in other countries truly affected me in a very deep and meaningful way. I'm not sure whether the experience changed me, or forced me to accept myself as I really am. The longer I spent abroad, the less interested I became in the academic path I was on. By the time I returned to the US, I had no idea what job I wanted to pursue. As a planner, it was very difficult for me not to have a plan. So, I started looking for one.

A couple of weeks ago, after hours of Googling, I found it. A feeling came over me... it was a good feeling of relief as well as purpose. The career I found was "Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse." I feel it fits my personality and skills well, and Ty agrees.

What does this mean for us?

Well, I'll graduate in May with a Bachelors of Science in Animal Sciences and Industry (and honestly, people are technically animals). After graduation, I will start in an accelerated BSN (Bachelors of Science in Nursing) program that will take anywhere for a year to fifteen months to complete. K-State doesn't have a nursing program, so we will have to relocate. Ty will continue his classes online. My fingers are crossed that Tucker will still want to live with us once we move. :)

Making a decisions like this--a change really--is scary. It will affect both my husband and I for the rest of our lives. When changing majors after a bachelors degree, it's easy to feel like I wasted three years of my life on an education I won't use. I have to keep reminding myself that this time in my life has been extremely valuable. I've learned more about animals that I love, I was married, I study abroad, and had so many opportunities through the college of agriculture that I might not have had in another program. Also, I was lucky enough to (finally) discover what I currently think is my calling in life.

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